Community worksheet

Cancelling plans due to mixed feelings

You wrote

I make plans and feel good about it at the time, but as the day gets closer I start dreading it. I come up with excuses and cancel. Afterwards I feel guilty and relieved at the same time. It's happening more often and I'm worried people are going to stop inviting me.

It sounds like there's a real push and pull going on for you — the anticipation of plans being enjoyable, yet the weight of dreading them as they approach. The feeling of both guilt and relief may be quite confusing.

01 · Answer any, leave any

Reflective questions

Question 1 of 5

When you first make plans, what specific thoughts or images come to mind that feel positive?

02 · Pick one to try this week

Quick exercises

Exploration of Initial Excitement
Spend 5 minutes writing about the specific aspects of making plans that feel enjoyable or exciting to you initially.
Pros & Cons of Cancelling
List the positive and negative aspects you experience when you cancel plans last minute.
Notice Pre-Cancellation Thoughts
Next time you consider cancelling, pause and jot down the thoughts that come to you in that moment before making the decision.

03 · Bring it to your therapist

Your next session

How might you raise this with your therapist?

A line or two is plenty. It stays with this worksheet, so you don't have to find the words on the day.

Your session board is in a free Studio. Save this worksheet there, note and all, and add it when you're ready.

OutSession 2026

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Reflective questions

Quick exercises

Spend 5 minutes writing about the specific aspects of making plans that feel enjoyable or exciting to you initially.

List the positive and negative aspects you experience when you cancel plans last minute.

Next time you consider cancelling, pause and jot down the thoughts that come to you in that moment before making the decision.

Your next session